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Saturday, November 12, 2005

The Funny Papers--Special Weekend Edition

With thanks to Bartcop:

In related news, Charles Manson is 71 years young today!

In Canadian politics, yet another round of He-Said/He-Said.

George keeps speaking without understanding what he's saying.

Jack Surges Ahead...of where he was...

Germany paves the way for Coalition governments everywhere!

Where was "Girls Gone WIld" for this one?

Or this?

Call this a draw.
My (Not-So) Hidden Talent

You have the natural talent of rocking the boat, thwarting the system.
And while this may not seem big, it can be.
It's people like you who serve as the catalysts to major cultural changes.
You're just a bit behind the scenes, so no one really notices.Now the big question: Am I more Machiavellian or Rovian in my approach...?
What's Your Hidden Talent?

I'll be back Monday, with more Bloggy goodness.

Friday, November 11, 2005

The Return of "Grumpy-God" Guy

Pat Robertson needs his meds upped.

"I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: if there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God, you just rejected him from your city," Robertson said on his daily television show broadcast from Virginia, "The 700 Club."
"And don't wonder why he hasn't helped you when problems begin, if they begin. I'm not saying they will, but if they do, just remember, you just voted God out of
your city. And if that's the case, don't ask for his help because he might not
be there," he said.

With all of the Old Testament-type rhetoric, how does he think he can pass himself off as Christian.

Jesus didn't make an appearance until the sequel.

So much for "forgive those who trespass against you"... Pat makes God sound like a petulent four year-old.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Harpo Has Trust Issues

Harper doesn't trust Layton to help bring down governmentSqueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Conservative Leader Stephen Harper says he won't introduce a non-confidence motion to topple the government because he has no faith in NDP Leader Jack Layton's support for the move.

Conservative leader Stephen Harper speaks during a luncheon in Toronto, Nov. 8, 2005. (CP photo)(not exactly as shown)
"Our experience suggests if we should again attempt to bring down the government, Mr. Layton would no doubt see our attempt as potential leverage in his negotiations with the Liberals as he has done on other occasions," Harper said Tuesday.

That sort of ties things up, doesn't it Steve-O, because Canada doesn't trust you to form our government, either.

Your move, bucky!

Darwin Booted Out Of Kansas...again!!!


Just when I think that the religious right will get tired of revisiting the Scopes trial...

Kansas education board downplays evolution
State school board OKs standards casting doubt on Darwin

MSNBC News Services
Updated: 8:03 p.m. ET Nov. 8, 2005

TOPEKA, Kan. - Risking the kind of nationwide ridicule it faced six years ago, the Kansas Board of Education approved new public-school science standards Tuesday that cast doubt on the theory of evolution.
The 6-4 vote was a victory for “intelligent design” advocates who helped draft the standards. Intelligent design holds that the universe is so complex that it must have been created by a higher power.
Critics of the new language charged that it was an attempt to inject God and creationism into public schools in violation of the separation of church and state.

All the while, true evidence is smirking them in the face!

Why should anyone believe, then, the drivel coming out of Baby Scalia about Roe V. Wade?

What does that mean anyways? He "respects" the decision. So, he'll salute it before pissing all over it?

I foresee L-Girl receiving a whole bunch of requests for info in the coming years...

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

The F@$%-in' Funny Papers

If you don't have your war on yet, what exactly are you waiting for?

Weren't you always wondering...?

Another friendly Funcentral quiz:

Your Pimp Name Is...

Dr. Glider
There are some readers out there (Mom, I'm thinking of you) whose Pimp Name I do not need to know. Sharing is not always caring. Sometimes, sharing is harmful.
The rest of you--share away!

The Blame Game

Now, don't get me wrong--I've never been adept at negotiating the rocky terrain known as brother-sister relationships...but even I would never dream of assigning blame to anyone else for the craptasticial PR summer enjoyed by Tom "No anti-depressants for me!" Cruise.

I guess that maybe the offers have stopped flooding in now, even while filming for MI3 s going on. Cuz Sister is g-o-n-e!

Here's hoping that the fake Tom Cruise blog will update shortly, with more "inside" info. My fave entry so far is "Save Katie? From What?"


Bad Scooter Searchin' For His Groove!

With a close encounter of a prison-soap kind now imminent, perhaps Lewis Libby will require all of the possible royalties from his scorching 1996 novel, "The Apprentice", that he can get his hands on.

To that end, I provide a link to a brief excerpt of the page-turner, and ask: Do you think George or Dick had read the book before giving Libby the Staffer job in the first place?

Amazon provides more snippets here, and a bizarre auction link for copies with an asking price of $599 US!
Bonus points to the first reader to correctly guess where the title comes from.


I hate white male Floridian legislators!


Florida girl has abortion blocked
A pregnant 13-year-old girl in Florida has been told she cannot have an abortion because she lacks the maturity to make such a decision.
A state court granted an injunction which prevents the girl from terminating her pregnancy.
She is three months pregnant and had planned to have an abortion on Tuesday of this week.

Here's where I stand on the Right to Choose, just in case anyone is curious: If it isn't my baby, it isn't my business!

However, I don't stop there, because I understand that a more definite policy is required, laws or no laws. The mother, failing mental or physical incapicity of such severity as to be unable to make a sound and legal decision one way or another, should be the final word on the matter of terminating or continuing any pregnancy.

The father could, but shouldn't have to be, consulted. If I were in that sitch, I'd hope to be--but who knows, right?

In general, Right-To-Life-ers characterize this choice as some rock-paper-scissors type decision, entered into as lightly as choosing lipstick or nail polish colours. This debasing makes it easier to hold their opponents in constant contempt. Screw them! The choice is never an easy one, at any age, at any time--ever!

Forcing a 13 year old girl to give birth for fear of angering their Cloud Deity??? That is obscene.

She didn't lack the maturity to have sex.

She didn't lack the maturity to make the decision to abort.

She was careless. Shit happens. That's what being young is all about. Becoming a mother before puberty ends seems like undue punishment.

Law and Government have no business here in this case.

--end o' rant--

Monday, November 07, 2005

Let's Pretend...

...that I'm Paul Martin, and I've just been informed that Jack Layton has resoundingly refused to further prop up my minority government.


...does "No" mean "No"?

Or does it mean "Try harder"?

With the surplus that I have, I could buy approximately 6,000 MRI machines, and still have some leftover for homeless shelters and better water for aboriginal reserves.

Do we really want to throw the damn country to Harpo and his band of idiots and yes-men?

If we pull the plug on the Minority gov't, that's fine with me--they won't be very effective legislatively now anyways. They've passed Bill C-38, which is enough of a legacy for most governments.

But now, what? Its doubtful that they would garner anything but another minority. As much as I've dreamt of the day, the NDP don't stand a chance of gaining that many seats. The notion of a Con-Bloq coalition is enough to scare me; a Conservative majority is enough to put me back on sedatives!

Honestly though, it is probably time for change, as much as I hate to say it. The longer that Martin holds onto power, the greater the eventual electoral backlash will be. We don't necessarily vote for change as much as get totally exasperated by the people holding the purse strings. We saw it in 1984, and again in 1993. We're overdue.

If the masses truly don't see the differences betwen Martin and Harper, then they deserve what they get.

Watch for me, spearheading the charge for an independent Ontario.

Fight the powers that be!

The Great Debate

Anyone else watch the live "West Wing" episode last night? It featured a fictional debate of the issues facing the US today. I couldn't help thinking that this is what should have happened last fall, if Kerry really wanted to win.

More importantly, it was how the Dems will stand a chance of winning in 2008. When Jimmy Smits' character lashed out at Hawkeye for labelling (libelling???) him a Liberal -- oooh, my heart stopped.

In Canada today, Jack Layton will supposedly conclude whether or not to remain supportive of the government, thereby stalling an election. When the CAW is telling the NDP leader what to do, it's pretty damn difficult to say no. Heads sez keep your party faithful, Tails sez break out of the labour ties of old, and forge a political future of unofficial party status. Your move, sir!

Don't Walk--Run!!!

...This is must-see stuff here!

They take on Bill Frist ("I'm mad as Hell, and I'm not gonna take it anymore"), Libby, Scalito, Rummy--and more!

So much idiocy, in one compact little list!

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Where were we...?

"It's been a long time since I rock and rolled, It's been a long time since I did the Stroll. Ooh, let me get it back, let me get it back,Let me get it back, baby, where I come from. It's been a long time, been a long time, Been a long lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely time.

Yes it has. " ~~Rock and Roll


Anything new with you?I never meant to take a six-and-a-half week vacation from the blog-o-sphere, but I guess I just ran out of steam, or at least clever things to say. Liam may question that last statement, arguing that it actually occurred sometime back in 1996...but I digress.

There was certainly no shortage of current events to comment on, what with the Hurricanes, Bush fucking everything up, Harriet Miers, Gomery, DeLay getting arrested, Bush fucking everything up, Tom Cruise having an earth baby, oil companies posting huge profits, Harriet withdrawing, Bird Flu/Pandemic mania!!!, more Gomery, Libby being indicted, Bush fucking everything up...

Was it just me, or did it look like Bush was going to nominate Dr. Pepper for Surgeon General next? (Sorry, I've been test-driving that line for weeks now. I should have blogged it sooner!)

Anyway, I'm back now, and I promise to start visiting your sites again too. I've been very bad. I don't know how to make it up to everyone. (The three or four of you, anyways...)So, I'll just start off by being me again...

  • How's this for a defence?
  • A gentle reminder that blogs are a public domain.
  • Is there only 25 of them? Anyone out there have others for the list?
  • With only a month and a half left for Christmas shopping, be sure to put your bid in on this E-bay item!
  • Local freebie paper banned at grocery chain over sex columnist; people continue having sex...This is what all of the fuss is about!

...and finally, if the War on Drugs ever requires new poster children, I nominate these two.

I promise not to be a stranger again, without prior notice.

I'm off to make tacos now, for me and my Sweet Baby. I'll see you back here again soon.

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